Have you ever really wanted something, but you held back just a bit out of fear or uncertainty?
Maybe you have a brilliant idea for a business, but you are afraid it might fail so you hold back and don’t give the idea your full attention.
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Do you have a book that wants to be written but you are holding back because the thought of someone reading your words feels vulnerable?
Perhaps you own a business and know it is time to increase your pricing, but you hold off because you are afraid of what your clients are going to say.
It’s human nature to hold back when we are afraid. It is also human nature to self-sabotage our dreams when we think they aren’t possible.
Several years ago, my husband and I were in marriage counseling. We had reached a point in our marriage where we didn’t know if we would survive. While I was invested in the relationship, I wasn’t giving 100 percent, and neither was my husband. Both of us wanted to make it work, but we were scared of being hurt, so we both held back just a bit in order to self-protect. We were each waiting for proof that the other was fully invested.
Our marriage counselor challenged both of us to spend the next month pretending we were all in. “I know you are afraid, but act as if you know you are going to make it. Act as if you know the other person is not going to leave. Treat your spouse like you are all in.”
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This advice was a huge turning point in our marriage, and it was ultimately a big part of what saved us. We are celebrating our 25th anniversary this fall.
Going all in is just as important with the decisions you make around money and business as it is in your personal relationships.
When we show up all in, it completely changes our mindset and our energy, which in turn changes how others interact with us as well.
Ironically, we often hold back in an effort to protect ourselves, but really what would create more is to be all in – to be 100 percent present and be 100 percent ourselves.
Holding back comes down to one basic human emotion: Fear. It could be fear of failure, fear of not having enough, or fear of being rejected for who you are.
Decisions based in fear rarely create more.
Is there a place in your life where you are holding back? Afraid to be fully you? Afraid to go all in?
What would be possible if you knew you could not fail?
What would be possible if you knew there was plenty of money?
What would be possible if you knew there were plenty of leads and plenty of clients?
So many times, we hold back in creating more money out of fear. Fear of scarcity holds us back. I know this sounds silly on the surface, but when we dig a bit deeper, we usually will find some self-sabotaging patterns that are keeping us from showing up completely. These patterns might look like:
- Not raising your prices or asking for a raise
- Avoiding important conversations with clients, bosses, or staff
- Putting off invoicing each month
- Focusing on busy work rather than income generating tasks
- Not investing in what you need to succeed – hiring support staff is a big one here
- Avoiding things that make you visible to potential clients like posting on social media and sending out your newsletter
- Focusing more on how to save money verses how to generate more money
- Saying yes to clients that are not a good fit
Are you ready to go all in? Stop making decisions based in fear and scarcity. Instead, focus on what is possible. Here are a few ideas of where to start:
- Set up systems that support you and make your workflow easier
- Look at your numbers on a regular basis so you can make empowered choices in your business
- Let go of clients who are not a good fit – there are more clients who ARE a good fit. When you let go of the clients who are not a good fit, you open up space for those who ARE the right fit to come to you
- Say no to a lead when your intuition tells you they are going to be a draining client
- Spend money on things that are going to make a difference in the long run, even if you are afraid – things like coaching, hiring support staff or purchasing task management or financial software
- Carve out a little time each day or week to work on your bigger goals and aspirations – baby steps will get you where you want to be
- Set up boundaries to avoid burnout
- Say yes to things that scare the $h*! out of you
- Say no when that scares the $h*! out of you
- Show up completely as yourself in your marketing and be visible to potential clients – money flows with ease when you are embodying all of who you are
What brings us the most joy, possibility and abundance is being fully expressed – Being all in. When we show up completely, heart and soul, we are living life to the fullest. When we stop living in fear and go all in, it changes everything. What would be possible if you were all in?
If you want more tips about how to go all in and leave fear and scarcity behind, download a free chapter of The Land of Plenty | A Soulpreneur’s Guide to Finding Joy, Possibility, and Abundance through Money Empowerment.
Carolynn Bottino is an author, speaker, and founder of the Money Empowerment Project®. Her international best-selling book of The Land of Plenty: A Soulpreneur’s Guide to Finding Joy, Possibility and Abundance through Money Empowerment was featured on the Spirited Woman’s top 12 book pick list for 2020.
After empowering more than 100 clients in her bookkeeping business, she discovered her passion helping soulpreneurs find joy around their money. Carolynn approaches money from a practical and holistic standpoint, with no judgement, helping you find abundance and transform your relationship with money.
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