When I take time to reflect on what I do in my daily life, I am often surprised to see how hard it is to keep my word on my best intentions. It’s as if there is something inside me that pushes me away from taking those desired actions that can improve my productivity and wellbeing.
I have discovered that much of our success happens not so much by focusing on the outcome — but rather on the process — as that is what will eventually get us there. And when it comes down to the process, this often translates into the habits we implement throughout our day.
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Our brains naturally seek to build habits as a way to save energy and automate behavior — and thank goodness for that. Imagine if every time you got into the car you had to learn how to drive again!
So I turned to the science that studies the brain to get a better understanding of how we can improve our habit building abilities.
The first thing I learned is that our brains do not distinguish between good or bad behaviors. The brain only reinforces what we feed it. Therefore, “coaching our brain” becomes essential if we want to improve the quality of our lives and avoid poor decisions!
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The second thing I discovered is that habits can be formed by focusing on 3 main elements: cue, routine, and reward — or the so-called “habit loop.”
While not always easy, with the right attitude, knowledge, and a bit of time, we can let go of bad habits and build great ones.
Cue
Habit loops begin with a cue. This refers to a particular trigger we may experience and it can be internal (such as an emotional state), or external (like a notification on our phone). Essentially, a cue is the initial motivator driving our behavior.
Routine
As the name suggests, this stage refers to the behavior we want to change — whether it’s quitting smoking or starting meditation. This is where the habit is built, and it is important to acknowledge that it doesn’t normally exist in a vacuum, nor does it occur consciously or out of a free will.
Reward
As our nature is to avoid pain and seek pleasure, this represents the most powerful part of a habit loop. It is what will help the brain remember to perform the routine. Rewards can be both tangible (earning money), or intangible (the feeling of mastery we get from completing an intended routine). What matters most is how valuable it feels to us.
As the reward is what motivates us to act, choosing one aligned to our wellbeing and personal growth is key: when we fail to do so, we risk falling for the instant gratification trap and hinder our resilience.
The trick to build stronger and healthier habits is by playing around with all 3 elements to find the right formula that works best for us.
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PUTTING THE HABIT LOOP INTO PRACTICE
Let me give you a practical example of how we use the habit loop to create a better habit. Say your desired routine is to sit down in the morning to plan your day.
Now that you are clear on the new routine, it’s time to understand the nature of the reward.
To make the most of this step, you must understand WHY you are doing it. The more meaningful reasons you can come up with, the more your brain will put a value to this activity, and connect it with a pleasurable experience (reward).
To ensure you stick to the routine, setting your environment up for success is key. In this case, this could mean finding a quiet place to sit down, or even putting your phone on silent. The next step is to isolate the cue. What is the trigger driving you to consider this new habit?
Other than your desire to feel more organized, it could also be the fear of not having the situation under control. There is no right or wrong answer, what’s important is being honest with yourself.
And finally, play around with the type of reward. My suggestion here is to focus on something intrinsically rewarding, such as growing your knowledge. When we rely solely on extrinsic rewards that bring us immediate gratification, we might succeed in forming the habit but not in growing as people.
Another powerful approach to help us build good habits is the so-called “if-then technique.”
As the name suggests, it’s a very simple way of anchoring our desired behavior to a specific moment or event. For example, I could say “if it’s 9 am, I will sit down and plan my day.” Because I am planning in advance and not giving my brain a choice, I am creating a stronger connection between the situation (if) and the action I want to take (then), increasing my chances of commitment.
Habits take time and aren’t built over night. But the one fundamental requirement other than repetition for our brain to cement the behavior is the attitude we have towards ourselves.
Be compassionate towards yourself if you fall short. Remember, Rome was not built in a day!
A passionate entrepreneur with a relentless aspiration to understand what makes people tick , Filippo is the cofounder together with his wife Marilena of 3SSENTIA, a smart day planner inspired by the science of wellbeing that helps busy people manage their day with more balance, focus and purpose.
His background in hospitality combined with his profound interest in subjects such as behavioural science, neuroscience, psychology and human computer interface inspired him to dedicate his efforts in developing technologies that provide “experiences for good”. Filippo is a believer that technology, if used consciously, can have the power to accelerate our evolution and flourishing as human beings. And that is exactly what his mission with 3SSENTIA is: creating a platform aimed at collectively expanding our consciousness and sense of purpose.
Filippo also runs Leap2yourbest (www.leap2yourbest.com), a 2-day personalised coaching program for entrepreneurs wanting to expand their personal and business growth.
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