Why Clearing Clutter Can Be So Difficult: The reason why letting go of things we own is so hard is because we are by nature attached to our stuff.
Don’t have time to read? Listen to this info on the go on my podcast here.
Often people assume that because I live clutter-free and help others clear their clutter and get organized, that it’s not hard for me to let go of things, or that I am not attached to my things.
But I am just like you very attached to my things and I am also very sentimental (in my podcast episode 37 I share the story of my 20-year-old jacket)
Science has an explanation, one of the reasons why we are so attached to our things is because
We have a tendency to undervalue things that aren’t ours and to overvalue things because we already own them.
Meaning, we value items much more highly as soon as we own them, this is a phenomenon called the Endowment Effect
Nobel Prize–winning researcher Daniel Kahneman and colleagues did a study demonstrating the power of this endowment effect.
They randomly gave coffee mugs to only half the subjects. The second group, the ones without the mugs, were asked what they would be willing to pay for a mug. The mere fact of ownership caused the mug owners to value the objects more highly and made them less willing to part with them.
The participants who “owned” the mugs refused to sell for less than $5.25, while those without the cups were not willing to pay more than $2.25 to $2.75.
What does that mean now when you are clearing your clutter?
Well, you probably experienced the following situation: you decided to let go of some of your stuff that you don’t use and don’t love anymore, but item after item you can’t seem to let go of a single one. They all seem to become more valuable the minute you contemplate whether or not to give them away.
Think of
- books on your shelf that you haven’t read in years or are outdated
- kitchen appliances still sitting in the box in the garage never used or maybe used once,
- a sweater you bought at a Black Friday sales 5 years ago but never wore because it’s not your style really.
The very fact that these items are yours makes you value them more highly than you would if they didn’t belong to you. That you don’t use them or love them seems to be less important.
And of course, this endowment effect is especially true for items we own with symbolic, experiential, or emotional significance.
What is interesting to know is that this attachment is not a learned behavior but rather something that we experience in infancy because it’s part of human nature.
Another researcher, Jean Piaget – one of the founding fathers of child psychology – observed that our sense of ownership emerges incredibly early. He was witnessing “violent rage” from babies whenever he deprived them of an item that they considered their own.
If you have children, you might have experienced that as well when for example a sibling takes away an item from his brother or sister.
There is a very informative short 4-minute TED-Ed video on YouTube by Christian Jarrett that explains this endowment effect
Keeping in mind that it’s in your nature to overvalue items that you own will help you move past the resistance when clearing your clutter. How?
A great question to ask yourself as you consider letting go of items you own is, instead of asking, “How much do I value this item?” ask
If I didn’t already own this item,
- how much would I be willing to pay to buy it?
- would I go out of my way to get it?
- How much money, time and effort would I put into acquiring one just like it?
Often when I help people clear their clutter, we come across so many items that they say “oh I had no idea I still had this”, or “I had no idea I even had this.”
They lived perfectly fine without any feelings of loss or regret of not having the item until they discovered they have the item and that very moment they become reluctant to give it away and all the “what if…” scarcity questions come up.
Stuck in the cycle of busy hoping that one day there will be time for your and what you want?
You are not alone. PEACEFUL LIVING COACHING is here to support you!
That’s the endowment effect playing tricks on you.
So next time you’re clearing clutter and this happens to you, be aware. Realize that you lived perfectly fine without knowing you had the item, or without needing the item, and that now that you found it, you are overvaluing it.
Ask yourself honestly, how much money and energy would I put into getting this item if I didn’t have it and then make a decision to keep it or let it go.
Don’t just read this blog, take action, start today, all it takes is a few minutes a day to keep the chaos away.
CONNY GRAF
Conny Graf is a Swiss certified Expert in Finance & Accounting, a certified Clutter Clearing Practitioner, Astrologer, Coach, Podcaster and the founder and owner of From Chaos to Peace Consulting Inc.
She’s helping people create supportive, clutter-free environments in their home, office, files, and finances but more importantly, she helps them develop habits and systems that prevent clutter from creeping back in. Clutter Clearing is not just about purging and organizing, it’s about exploring and releasing the limiting beliefs we tell ourselves and the stories that keep us stuck in the past. Dealing with clutter brings us up-to-date with who we are right now and where we are heading in your life and business while being organized is simply a side-effect.
Her mission is to help people understand that decluttering is self-love, and a few minutes a day keep the clutter away. Come on a journey from chaos to peace with ease.
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