No matter what your relationship with food and dieting is like, the holidays can be a little tricky to navigate! This blog is designed to help you overcome some of the most common hurdles we experience during this time of year (or really any time).
For years, we have been taught to feel terrified of dessert, carbs, fat, sugar etc. All of which are much more present around the holidays. We are told these foods need to be limited, and even restricted entirely in an attempt to be as thin as possible. Or that if we do decide to indulge in these items, we need to “get back on track” after the holidays (meaning dieting and exercising like crazy). Often this is done with the intention of being healthy, but is it really healthy to replace fun, joy and connection with guilt, shame and dissatisfaction?
Have you ever noticed that when you try to limit or restrict your favorite foods it leaves you feeling obsessed and often ends with you eventually giving in and over-eating them anyway? This does not make you a failure, it’s the way our brains are wired!
Stuck in the cycle of busy hoping that one day there will be time for your and what you want?
You are not alone. PEACEFUL LIVING COACHING is here to support you!
The reason for this pattern is not that you have no willpower, or that you are addicted to sugar like most people think. It is set in motion with how you think about your favorite holiday treats. Maybe, to you, they are cheat food or bad food. Maybe it’s forbidden food, irresistible food, or addictive food? But no matter what you call it, it’s still just food! No one food is going to make you healthy or unhealthy. Of course you wouldn’t feel very good if all you did was eat sweets, but you also wouldn’t feel very good if all you ate was kale. Demonizing some foods and putting others on a pedestal will never be helpful in creating a balanced healthy lifestyle. If we want more balance in our lives, we need to stop labeling foods good or bad and learn to listen to our bodies instead. Why? Because willpower will eventually run out, and it feels awful to spend all your mental energy thinking about food and changing your body!
Another hurdle you might encounter this holiday season is unwanted comments on your body or food choices from well meaning relatives. These comments often leave us feeling anxiety, shame, guilt, anger, and so much more! Have you ever worried about seeing your family over the holidays because you have gained weight? Or maybe you have avoided eating what you want because you’re scared of getting judged, only to end up eating it in private away from prying eyes? You are not alone, so many people struggle with these things! My advice to you is to make a game plan for the holidays that includes how you plan to handle these comments. Remember, you don’t need to start an argument or make it a big dramatic scene. All you really need is a one liner to shut down these comments, or set a boundary.
Some examples of one liners you could use would be…
- “I would prefer you didn’t comment on my body, can we talk about something else?”
- “I’m focusing on enjoying myself tonight”
- “I am capable of making my own food choices, thank you for your concern!”.
Make sure you also make a plan for how you will respond if they don’t stop. Maybe you can plan to walk away, change the subject, or start talking to someone else. It might feel rude or uncomfortable at first and that’s okay, just remember, you don’t have to put up with someone continuously disrespecting your boundaries for the sake of keeping the peace.
The final hurdle I want to talk about is how the media ramps up the diet ads in the new year. Don’t be fooled, they don’t care about your health, they care about profiting off your insecurities. These ads can be especially hard to resist when we have spent the holidays eating our favorite foods and have seen the evidence of this show up on the scale. When you start seeing these ads show up, my challenge to you is to ask yourself 3 questions.
- What results has dieting in the new year gotten you in the past? How did you feel and behave in the moment, and did any of the results you gained last long term? For example, if you lost weight, did you keep it off? If you felt proud of your results, did you also feel guilt, shame and anxiety when you couldn’t keep going? Really dig deep and spend some time reflecting on this.
- What do you believe losing weight will give you? Whatever these things are for you, is weight loss the only way for you to get these things? For example, if you think losing weight will give you self confidence, I can guarantee it’s possible to feel confident without losing a single pound!
- How would it feel to stop spending your money on trying to change yourself and instead spend it on learning to love and appreciate yourself as you are? What long term benefits might you have to gain from this?
I know even after reflecting on these questions that it might be tough to resist the urge to give in to these ads and just try one more time to lose the weight and keep it off. I am not saying you can’t do this, if it’s what you really want to do. But if you do, I hope you will remember that if it doesn’t work out the way you want it to, it’s because intentional weight loss attempts have a 95% failure rate, NOT because you didn’t try hard enough. If you are ready to try something new, maybe what you should actually consider spending your money on this new year is working with me 1on1 to improve your body image and your relationship with food. If this sounds like an intriguing idea, check out my website for more info on what I offer and how to book a FREE 30 minute body image call with me I am so excited to meet you!
JENELLE CARTO
Hi, I’m Jenelle! I am from beautiful Calgary, Alberta! That’s in Western Canada, for those of you who just said “where?!” I live with my spouse, who is an airline pilot, and our dog, an adorable Yorkie/Jack Russell mix named Abbie. I work by day as an insurance broker, and I also have a lifestyle blog that focuses mostly on body image, self-love, and breaking down stigmas and societal expectations.
My idea and passion for my business came from my personal experiences and self-love journey. Starting when I was about 10 years old, I grew up with little confidence and body image issues, after childhood trauma triggered an eating disorder. It progressed even further as I became a teenager and started struggling with societal expectations, chronic anxiety, and migraines. This was followed by periods of depression and panic attacks in my early 20s, leading to an all-time low when I finally started dedicating my time to improving my mental health and self-image. I’m sure a lot of you can relate to these struggles and understand just how horrible it can feel living in a world that profits off of convincing us we’re never good enough.
Over the last 5 years, I have learned so much, and have come to a place where my mental health is stable. I have learned to love myself and feel confident and sexy regardless of what the number on the scale says, and I am finally done with the endless cycle of thinking about food, my next diet, and how much I hate myself and my body!
My goal is to share how I did that with as many people as I can, and to make my business as inclusive and welcoming as possible to all those still marginalized by our society. I see you and am trying my best to make everything I offer in my business with you in mind.
If you’re interested in following my journey and getting updates on my budding business as I grow, follow me on Facebook or Instagram at the links below.
